Boredom, Vice and Need

Work saves us from three great evils: boredom, vice and need.

~ Voltaire

“I’m a direct care provider for individuals with developmental disabilities.”

“I’m the operations manager for a local radio station.”

“I manufacture circuit boards for heating and air condition units.”

In the past, these replies to various interlocutors have defined me, bookmarking my place in the workforce. I’ve done many things, and I’ve done them well. Now, I sheepishly reply . . .

“I’m laid off.”

And the way things are looking, I might as well just go the extra step and define myself as unemployed. A call back may happen for those of us on the lower rungs, but how long will it last this time?

So I apply for bullshit jobs. They seem to be the only jobs out there. Jobs my tween could do with a blindfold firmly affixed upon her big, bright eyes. And I wait for the call. Not the one from the bill collectors; those are myriad and wearisome, for there is no money to send. No, I wait for the call that someone, anyone, would like to talk to me about the ________ position, wondering if I’m free on ________ for an interview.

There is a shimmer of hope, a mirage perhaps: an old friend from my radio days called several weeks ago, wondering what it would take for me to go back to work for the company. In Cincinnati. We’ve chatted a couple times, sent emails back and forth, and we’ve brainstormed a plan that just might work, making the three-hour commute and time away from my family closer to worth it. But there are hurdles that need cleared.

So I wait. Like a kid with her head pressed to the window, looking for something that may sneak around the corner. For a chance to do what I once loved doing. Something I’m realizing I might love doing again.

Those shades I used to wear, because the future was so bright? I can’t seem to find them anywhere . . .

(For an update on this post, click here.)

[photo credit]

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11 thoughts on “Boredom, Vice and Need

  1. There’s always hope…
    I’m unemployed, laid off, and in a new city, it’s fun, but it’s also disheartening to not know what to do, or where to start. But there’s always hope, for you and I because we’re not the kind of people that let a title like ‘Unemployed’ break us. I’m positive that something will happen for you and for me in the near future, it’s not like we don’t deserve it. 🙂

  2. It’s got to be so frustrating for you. Keep hope alive, something will come along eventually.

    In the meantime, have you sent any of your writings off to be published? That might be a way to bring in a little extra $$$ while you wait. You are talented enough, I am confidient you could find a publisher.

  3. These are frustrating times for so many. I’ll keep sending you good thoughts. In the meantime, I like kweenmama’s idea… Freelance, baby!

  4. I know of many people with similar stories, some even more complicated because they aren’t laid off, just having their (previously full-time) hours shaved back to levels where they can no longer support their families.

    There’s a phenomenon going around now that some are calling employed guilt. I know I feel guilty for the fact that I’m not laid off.

  5. I’m sorry. I hope for the best for you! You writing is spectaculor, but that just comes from someone that likes to read, not from a professional or anything!

    I came over from the Tales From The Dad Side.

  6. I’m so sorry to hear that. I can honestly say that I know what it’s like to have bill collectors calling and have no money to send. It sucks. I wish you the best. I really wish you could do something with your writing ability because you are just THAT GOOD.

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