Be pleasant until ten o’clock in the morning and the rest of the day will take care of itself.

~ Helen Rowland

Yeah.  Whatever, Helen.

Anyway . . .

Because memes are quick and easy, and because commenting on meme posts require almost no intellectual effort . . .


. . . I offer the following in response to Jason’s challenge.

Ten Random Things about Yours Truly

(Jason did 25, but he’s an overachiever.)

1. In college, I ran a Contemporary Christian Music radio show called “Radio Free Jesus”. My most popular segment was the “Heaven’s Metal Hour” from 11:00pm until midnight. People just couldn’t get enough of Vengeance Rising. My long-haired, Bible-bangin’ brethren requested “Beheaded” every week . . .

I want my head chopped off
You’ll see my body rot
But then I’ll reign with Christ
And then you will fry

Yeah . . . I’m embarrassed . . .

2. My first full time gig in radio was as the music director for a southern gospel radio station. The highlight of my career? Interviewing Vestal Goodman. She called me “honey” about 50 times.

3. I have an attractive birthmark on the second toe of my right foot. If you’ve just eaten, please close your eyes as you scroll down . . .



4. I know what the beginning of Petra‘s song “Judas’ Kiss” says backwards.

Do you?

5. I once bet a friend I could drink a gallon of Hershey’s Chocolate Milk in an hour and keep it down.

I did. For about thirty seconds. Then I lost it out both ends. What joy! What fun!

6. Once, while working as an intern for X-whatever (now defunct) in Minneapolis, I shared a copier with 92 KQRS morning show host and Howard Stern ass-whooper Tom Barnard. It’s the closest I’ve ever been to radio royalty. I think he smiled at me, in a “could you hurry up” kind of way.

7. I’ve read, in their entirety, Moby Dick, The Brothers Karamazov, and Don Quixote. They each took a summer to complete, and I read all the footnotes. One day, when I’m older and greyer, I’d like to tackle Proust.

8. I used to use TRESemmé Mega Sculpting Gel to keep my gorgeous hair in place.

Now, I use a hat. To keep what’s left in place.

9. I started playing Dungeons & Dragons again in my mid-30’s, so I could spend some quality time with my son, and spend less dough on Yu-Gi-Oh cards. My favorite character I ever played was Dexter Duchovic. Now, I don’t play anymore because 4.0 sucks ass.

10. I know every word of the Powerpuff Girls episode titled “Los Dos Mojos”.

TMI? I thought so . . .

[photo credit]

27 thoughts on “Ten

  1. I do miss the adventures of Dexter. I think you should start a separate blog in his honor, and we could all enjoy his further adventures.

    Thanks for “Vengeance Rising”, that has to be one of the funniest Christian songs I have ever heard of. The sad part, coming I will admit from an atheist with a chip on his shoulder, is that that really does sound like what a lot of Christians think . I have been told, “I will pray for you”, in tones that make you realize that it is a Christian form of “F**k you”, way too many times to count.

  2. Funny thing about Vengeance . . . their lead singer, Roger Martinez, went from born-again thrasher to Satanism to evangelical atheism. Compare this . . .

    . . . to this from the Wiki page . . .

    “After the September 11, 2001 attacks occurred, Martinez offered free albums from his website for military personnel to encourage a “holy war against Christians.” Former fans and critics believe this to be an attack on former bandmates and Christianity, due to the straining situation of debt that he was left with when band members departed after the “Once Dead Tour”.

    Vengeance did do an interesting cover of Deep Purple’s “Space Truckin'” on one of their albums, so they gotta be a bit cool, no?

  3. Damn, I really need a brain scrub now. For the thing I shall not name.

    Radio Free Jesus? That is too awesome. I may just start a new blog with that name.

  4. Gwen, if you do start it, maybe R.E.M could redo “Radio Free Europe” for a theme song for ya! I’m sure they would if you asked nicely. :)

    Just think:
    “Radio Free Jesus, Radio free…”

    OK, maybe not so much.

  5. Ok. About that toe photo…..

    Holy Vengence Rising. You are like none other. Let me count the ways….more than 10, I’ll tell you that.

    Send me your address, I’ll send you a train card!

  6. That may be the most unique (and potentially disturbing) list I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading.
    I just want to know how you contorted yourself to actually take a picture of that birthmark.

  7. I must have played that backwards clip ten times with no luck. What made you get out of the radio business???

    I may be heading to Indianapolis soon for a brewery tour/festival (dark Lord Day @ 3 Floyds Brewery) . You should come!

  8. Re: The Birthmark

    I was indeed born with that monstrosity. It must be a sort of mole or something. It’s never given me problems, turned colors, itched, oozed, or festered. It’s just . . . there. Out of sight. Until now . . .

    My wife took the picture . . .

    Re: The Backmasking

    Petra, a pioneering Christian rock band, recorded that song on an album titled More Power To Ya way back in 1982. Churches were busy playing Queen, The Eagles, and Led Zeppelin backwards and telling us impressionable teens that we were on our way to Hell for listening to this stuff forwards. We burned records. Swore off secular music. Knelt at the altar and pleaded for forgiveness. So Petra came out with this little gem. The backwards part kicks off the song, and says “What are you looking for the devil for when you outta be looking for the Lord?” We used to play the vinyl record backwards for listeners on-air.

    Re: Radio

    I got out of radio when the station I worked for was sold to a Catholic organization. Being NOT Catholic, I was forced to move on. I looked for other jobs in the area but nothing worked out. I miss my radio days, but I’m not sure I could go back. Unless the right gig comes along . . .

    Re: Indy

    Nate, I would love to go to Indy. I am probably going to be laid off at the end of next week, so depending on when the trip happens, I may just be up for it . . .

  9. You’re a D and D geek! Seven D and D geeks show up at my house every Wednesday night to play strange mind games in the attic with my geek husband. My ten year old daughter has just started playing too. I refer to them as my own personal Geek Squad. Without the punch buggy. None of them have unsightly things growing under their toes though. That would qualify you as Geek in Chief.

  10. But what glorious TMI you’ve pulled out to share! Funny thing: I used to come on right after the Christian Crossover radio show at my college radio station. do you have any idea how hard it is to find pagan classical music? Thank god (is that inappropriate in this context?) (goddess?) for Aaron Copeland, Debussy, Beethoven, and Vivaldi! (It was a lot easier to do the classic rock show, that’s for sure!)
    Great list, mah bruthah!

  11. I’m kind of glad you stopped at 10. Not sure I could handle another 15.

    Funny side though. In college I sang in a Contemporary Christian Band–more Amy Grant, Imperials, Russ Taff stuff not the hardcore Petra and Vengence.

  12. Unlike Ed, I believe you OWE us another 15, tysdaddy! Thank you so much for reading my “25” and thanks to Jason for cluing me into the “meme.” This is more fun than I thought it would be!



  13. One summer I worked at our teeny tiny small town radio station. I was the receptionist and I wrote psa copy. My first day there, a guy wandered in. He had ridden the bus from Nashville and wanted us to play his record–The Day the Buffalo Jumped Off the Nickle. I loved working there. The place was so old-fashioned that they shot part of Coal Miner’s Daughter there. It still had all it’s 1950-era equipment.

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